There is something penitential about Clagsborough College. To be elected a professor there, one must at the barest minimum have read every single book in the library. None has succeeded to that hallowed rank who was ever less than a hundred years old, and most aspirants prefer to wait until their second centenary before applying. Familiarity with the bibliotheca should be such that a candidate demonstrates a capacity for gestalt analysis and, crucially, they must produce a work sufficiently perspicacious that it becomes one of those rare additions to its shelves. And no text may be admitted to the library unless a majority of professors approve it.